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Just how far have you degraded yourself and others for a women?

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Well folks, we hit an all time low last night. And i've been pretty low, but this one was a little bit special. Showgirls bar20 was the arena. My stupid male jealously/pride the catalyst. Bonnie is stripping these days. Doing rather well so she had told me. There is still no word on me getting my $1000 back tho. Despite her boasts of puling that in minimum in a night.

So after a 6 day week and 4 tins of Wild Boar - www.wildboarbourbon.co... (my weapon of choice these days) I thought fuck it. I'm going down for the 'mega-strip' www.bar20.com.au/websi...

Now in my minds eye I had visions of sitting quietly at the back, just out of the field of vision. Watching Bonnie and 20 other exotic dancers perform and 'flap their bits' as she had described it to me. Then i'd step out of the shadows, catch her eye, an trigger a tsunmai of shame and comfortableness in her. Now it wasn't a very noble plan. And like most of my plans concocted after a period of heavy drinking it wasn't bullet proof.

The first hurdle was the bouncers. 'Too much to drink mate', walk around the block and come in. Balls. I complied. I wandered through a multi storey car park on king street furtively sipping my last boar missing the mega strip. Now I should of aborted at this stage. The omens were not good. Being pig ignorant and piss drunk however I presented myself 20 minutes later for a second bite at the cherry.

This time I got in. The anxiety added an extra kick to the burboun already swilling around my gut as I ascended the faux marble stair case. Glossy A1 photo's of nudes with big hair and dead eyes seemed to mock me with every step.

I entered the floor and my nostrils were assaulted by by the smell of baby oil and desperation.I made my way over to the bar, ordered an $8 half pint and wa immediately pounced upon by 'Oliva' from croydon. Her accent grated, as did her insistence on me having some 'fun' I was not here for 'fun'. I had much more serious matter to attend to. Not least a broken heart and wounded pride.

It didn't take long to get my bearings. My eyes absorbing and discarding all the carnal offerings to the thumping auto tune of will.i.am. Then, though the smoky glass of the VIP room I seen an unmistakable flash of bleach blonde hair. She was giving a private dance. All the private dances take place in the same area, I thrust $50 into Oliva's sweaty palm and she lead me toward the VIP section. Bonnie clocked me as soon as I walked in. She was completely naked thrusting her fake breasts into an over weight 40somthing city types face.

But in much the same way as I imagine dogs can smell fear she clocked me and instantly knew this was hurting me more than it could ever hurt her. Oliva guided me to a seat and began to to remove her bra. But all I could was Bonnie. She was now bent over thrusting her pussy into this man's face. He was loving it, I was choking back the tears. Oliva began her well choreographed number but could sense my l was in the grip of a panic attack. Those 4 minutes lasted a lifetime. It was horrific. Bonnie finished her whore dance and quickly left the VIP area. I sat shell shocked in disbelief as Oliva ambivalently gyrated through the chours. she had lost her knickers at some stage and I noticed a tattoo of a rose right beside her well groomed box. I looked over to the door and there were 2 monkey men. at the entrance. The track changed, Oliva kissed me on the cheek and headed for the exit. I pulled myself to my feet and was immediately grabbed by the 2 bouncers and thrown out on the street. It has to be one of the lowest points of my life.

Almost tempted not to post this. But hopefully some else will have a worse/better story. I can honestly say I wont be back to a strip bar in a very very very long time.

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I doth thy cap nate dog

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DB you have zero luck with women, ou attract the undateable elementsy

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I know mate, its bloody ridiculous. I mean im not a terrible cunt. Little fucked up round the edges, but sure who isn't in this crazy world. It wasn't always this way. When I was young I actually dated some really nice girls. It might sound ridiculous, but I almost think that an ex some way down the track actually put a curse on me :/ That is ridiculous to think that. But fuck as of late I truely have had zero luck with women.

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I'm not sure this is actually your "all time low" tbf

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Enlighten me then please if you would J-Roc. Feels pretty dam low from where I'm laying.

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Wow. Crazy shit if true bill. You should write a book fella

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Your a 1 way express train to wrecksville and bonnie is driving the train, seriously man get the fuck off it pack up and go check out another city and leave bonnie to the wolves who'll shel'l no doubt run into one of these days

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Love reading these posts. I reckon RJ is right though, time to make a move to another city. Going down to that strip club was always likely to end in tears. Bonnie sounds destined for a serious train wreck lad and you'd be better off elsewhere when it happens.

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lol

gas that ho DB

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my advice is get some counselling.

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Awesome, not the heart ache and despair, just the storytelling

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DB, can you handle high temperatures and humidity? I think you need to take yourself up to darwin, you'd love it up there

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bonnie doesnt exist u fucking spastics

pat bateman written all over him

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She does exist, and she's an A minus! Db's only a B, quickly heading toward being a C plus. Do any of you guys listen? Good update DB.

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lol

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lol @ waxy

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very well written. MOAR

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i think you need to tell her how you feel DB. you need to go back to the strip club and don't leave till she's on your arm.

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so you got blocked and went to the strip club bonnie works at, when she spotted you there she had you kicked out.

hardly your all time low is it!

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Why do I get the feeling Bonnie is imaginary like yer woman from battlestar galactica.

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Innit aLegend... I personally thought spending a day taking crack with a crack whore before accompanying her to an abortion clinic was a tad more grim than getting kicked out of a strip joint

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There is no pain like a brokn heart tbf

Db buddy, nothin to do with a curse.. The girls you choose show the signs early on. You just gotta learn to turn on your heels and walk away once you see them.

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if youd got bonnie to do the lapdance this woulda been an alltime lower low but great story and writing if true u got my sympathies still reckon u should be writing a book of all this

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Leave those videos back yet db?

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Not sure if this guy is genuine, I do remember the small claims thread from the old forum being a good read though, and that girl in it, she was actually real then?

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i wanna see the meth fuelled sex tapes he made with bonnie in chinatown......sounds seedy as fuck *munches popcorn*

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I think the time has come to post the tapes up tbf

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up untill this post i left a small small amount of hope in myself that doombadger was real. This post was well to well written, almost wanting to be read like a book that makes me think this is all a massive spoof. but mate you have some talent for writing and i would love to read one of your book if you made one about life and times in belfast or abroad.

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That's exactly what i was thinking too sumguy

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he is defo real btw

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are these real stories though. He should definitely write a book either way. Or get a blog on the go

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If I ended up drinking pre-mixed Bourbon & Cola from a can I'd describe it as an all time low.

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yep i believe there are elements of truth in his stories...crazy as it may seems...the guy is box office

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Wise up, of course he's real.

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Yer woman Bonnie was ok looking, from what I remember he's a pretty ugly cunt. Why the fuck would she be burgling him? She probably comes onto the pizza joint he works in and hes a bit obsessed

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I love ol db, always a good read.

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Jesus man. There's significant people in your life and people you have got into the habit of doing drugs with. Learn to distinguish between the two and stick a pin in the globe.

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The Stalker Diarys. Did you leave with an item of clothing or maybe a block of cheese. "I'VE GOT CHEESE! I'VE GOT CHEESE!"

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3-ec.buzzfed.com/stati...

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Pre mixes are balls on toast

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'I can honestly say I wont be back to a strip bar in a very very very long time.'

Surely this should be 'for a very very very long time'? Ruined the story for me.

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Could be worse you could be her www.vice.com/read/the-...

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getting back to the question how far have you degraded yourself for a woman,

I was about to say as a joke I let a bird pish on me and slap me about but I can see that one getting taken seriously and rumours spreading of me being in an abusive relationship

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great read

batemanesque

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Aul MTB loves a bit of the ole slap & pish

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I drew the line at the 12 inch black wobbler that got pulled out ready for action

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tarmac

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www.urbandictionary.co...

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Time for pastures new DB. Period.

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