Choose a discussion

how to shit correctly

1

about 3-4 weeks ago, of my own accord, i started using the toilet like this -

i'd read ages ago that elevating your legs on a stool in front on the bog helps get a better bowel movement, but in the absence of a stool, a few weeks ago i just totally debagged, hopped up and squatted as shown in the picture. i liked it and have been doing it ever since.

today while browsing a health forum, i found a discussion that linked to this - naturesplatform.com/he...

so that's why my body told me to stick to the squatting. it's how it should be done.

when i move into my own house i'm going to have the bog replaced with one of these - www.washwareessentials...

that should suitably startle guests.

try out the squatting folks. see how you like it.

when you're born and bred in the western world, it can take you to 30 years old to learn how to shit.

0 |
1

wat

0 |

whole new level of forumming.

1 |

favourite crisp flavour, favourite shitting positions. whatevs.

0 |

Hahahahahahahaah this made me shit myself laughing.... good job :D

0 |

I often laugh myself shitting.

I loved the loo's in China and Vietnam as they mostly are for squatting .....and they all had a dinky water pistol device for squirting up yer crack incase of stubborn shizzles!

0 |

i walked into the toilets of a club in Vietnam to find a woman squatting on a toilet in said position!

www.google.co.uk/imgre...

the majority of the world do not shit on toilets.

the bum guns were a novelty zygote.

0 |

The craic you'd have with one of those stainless steel jobbies in your house and a load of mates round with lots of yokes.

0 |

the stool for your stool approach definatley works. its an intresting area when you thnk of possible side affects of shittin on a toilet!

0 |

is it a comfortable position for enema injections... or do you prefer to be lie down for those?

0 |

Gillian McKeith said that years ago mate! Not exactly squatting but elevating your legs on top of a bin or a 'stool'

0 |

She knows her shit as well

0 |

So how many people you reckon will go home and try this tonight?

0 |

I used to piss like that when i was wiped out

1 |

Would be an awful lot of backsplash?

0 |

That's quite a small hole you have to aim into. Be kind of a novelty for the first wee while.

0 |

Books I have in my bog:

The Secret
Keith Lemon's The Rules-69 ways to be successful
The Goddess Guide
The Liverpool Supporters Guide book

Need to expand to more intellectual books I think

0 |

So toilet seat up or down?

Up means your feet might be in about the splashed piss from the last day or week since toilet has been cleaned and the seat down might slip unless you're sure your seat is fixed firmly and tightly in place. At least thats the dilemma i am facing in my house.

0 |

we have a selection of fine books and reading material. Even better having a musical toilet experience, bring in the uke or guitar. This actually happens.

0 |

I play poker on the toilet quite a lot but have never ventured into the toilet with the guitar although now it is inevitable that soon I shall.

0 |

you need a good stable toilet seat, in the down position. you could build or buy a platform - lillipad.co.nz

might actually build one.

0 |

amazing stuff from alegend

Your life must be a complete joy, next thread topic: How to enema your way to success

0 |

Its great gherkin, you get the best sounds in the bathroom too. From the guitar i mean.

0 |

Wouldn't fancy trying to get on a bog like that when steamboats or wapped. End up falling off mid dump and soiling the underbags.

0 |

Do you not feel like a total wab though?

0 |

Brilliant hahaha. You have to do this quite alot in SE asia as there are no flushing toilets.

0 |

I crapped in a hole while elephant trekking in Thailand. It was meant to be a toilet. Feels good to dump in the open air, loads of flies - not so good though.

0 |

I want to try this but the thought of missing and having to clean the mess or even worse slipping and covering myself in dung would put me off. If I could find one of those liliput squatting platforms id be in business!

0 |

Never buy uncut Rigsy?

The daddy of music mags in mine opinion.

0 |

Also what about pooping and pissing simultaneously?? surely somethings gotta give and again I don't fancy scrubbing a pish spattered wall.

0 |

get your begs clean off when doing it. and get into a position so there's room at the front to urinate.

shitting and pissing simultaneously is annoying for me at the best of times in the regular sitting position, as i find most toilet bowls curve back at the front too soon. this new position solves that issue.

0 |

A thorough wash every couple of days should sort out your fly problem, duffy

0 |

lol @ getting the bags clean off yourself. Is that what they do with those toilets? the thought of someone squatting for a shit in their socks is too much

0 |

some suggest we should all squat to pee as well - bhls.wordpress.com/201...

from now on, at least while at home, i will.

0 |

hahah. debagging makes it easier to get onto the toilet in the correct position, and easier to go.

i think doing it with begs around your ankles would take some practice.

0 |

aye and you wouldn't want to be risking it after a few pints. Crapping straight back into your briefs is definitely not cool.

0 |

i48.tinypic.com/2nmu6v...

0 |

In before glass coffee tables.

0 |

funny-pictures-blog.co...

0 |

Reading on the ipad/ereader and squatting would take practice too I think.

0 |

i.qkme.me/35d4xs.jpg

0 |

Sometimes I think shat is the forumming equivalent of bumblebee from transformers, and can only speak in links to jpegs and gifs.

Also, shit noir.

0 |

They have those in french toilets. I thought the whole squatting thing was for people scared of catching something off toilet seats. I was deer hunting last year and had to poop outside. I came prepared with bog roll but had to go on a slope. Fucking pooping outdoors and squating in general. Id rather have a coffee enema.

0 |

to reinvent the toilet. and have the whole western world run with your invention. something that combines the benefits of the squat, with the modesty and comfort of the throne. over to you brain.

0 |

funny-pictures-blog.co...

0 |

Don't forget to add a power rack over the toilet for the likes of deckard, work out the cannons while droppin a deuce.

0 |

Fuck that, I was traumatised as kid when I used a squat down toilet in France. Unknown to me I shit down the back of my shorts then walked the whole way across the campsite back to our pitch only to be laughed at uncontrolably by my parents. Sit the fuck down on a normal toilet and get a kid's foot stool if you want to raise your legs. But yes, it does help as my daughter has had long term constipation from a baby.

1 |

Matt O(h dear Lord).

0 |

PS she didn't catch long term constipation from a baby.

0 |

I need to relax everything in body to pinch a loaf. A hunched over position would not help me achieve relaxation. I'd be concentrating too much on balancing.

Went to the bathroom there and the bowl was clean before but pre-flush the water was a bluish green colour. Ideas?

0 |

www.howtodoitinthewood...

0 |